Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

what did the fish say when he was eaten by a shark nothing fish cant talk

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

The weels on the bus go...flat

Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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Whos breath stinks and mas in jail. Bomber Neville

What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

tobi is so gay that he is the mayor of sanfrancisco

How do you make a ninja fly a plane? You put a gun to his head and say fly this plane.

Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

What's the worst part about censorship? **** *** **** **** *** **** *** ********.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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