When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

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What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they!

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What did the bungee jumper say to his wife? Honey, I'm going bungee jumping today.

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I WILL DESTROY ISIS

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What did one hater say to the other hater? I hate you.

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A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

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I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

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Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Republicans

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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What do a black person and a monkey have in common? A. They both are organism that need food and water to survive.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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No. Yes.

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Male penises.

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If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

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Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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