The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

<=-):[ J1MMY | Dubstep Maniacs Crew 4 Life ]:(-=>

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

Women.

What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

How many gay men does it take to change a lightbulb? Usually, it takes one gay male to complete this action.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Your Mamas So Fat That When She Jumped Into The Ocean All The Whales Swam Around And Started Sinqinq (We Are Family Even Though Your Fatter Than Me.)xD

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

What's really weird? It's you Greg!

your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

A depressed gay illegal immigrant walks into a bar and the bartender asks why he's sad. The man replies "I'm the most unwanted man in America."

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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