Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

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Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

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Whats the easiest way to kill a blonde? Shoot her

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What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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ask me if im a house are you a house? no

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

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Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

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when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

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A Mexican walks up to a fence in Texas and watches as the police take away his next door neighbor for tax evasion.

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Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

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I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

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Proof reading

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A Palestinian and an Israeli both board a plane at the same time. They exchange awkward glances and take seats at different ends of the plane.

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do you wanna hear a joke cutsforbieber#

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Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

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Person 1: You know whats funny? Person 2: No! What? Person 1: A joke!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops