when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

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I like hats XD!

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Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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What's worse than rush hour traffic? Your childhood friend, Ricky, was just brutally killed by a street cleaner

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Yo Momma is so fat that she is heavier than most other women her age

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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my nAME IS ALAN AND IM NOT COOL

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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Hi is the longest two letter word in the world

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your Bike.

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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Person 1: You know whats funny? Person 2: No! What? Person 1: A joke!

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Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

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Proof reading

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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What is one plus one? I don't want to do math.

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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