How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a garbage can? Being the one who found them.

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A man walked into a bar. He broke his nose.

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That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

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Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

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Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

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- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

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how bout that airplane foood!!!1

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fatest boner fatest boner fatest boner to adam ramsden

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If u wanna get high, smoke weed

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How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

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How many rabbits does it take to screw in a light buld? None, it is scientifically impossible for a rabbit to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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This is a sentence. This is also a senctence.

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Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

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You know what really grinds my gears? Shifting into "park" before my car's fully stopped.

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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