How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

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What did the asian parent say to his kid when he got a D? -It's OK son, you will do better next time.

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9001

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Do you know what will hurt? Getting hurt.

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

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How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

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How do you scare a blonde? Put the barrel of a gun to the side of her head.

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yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

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Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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what did the black guy say to his friend who was on acid? man you trippin.

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How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

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women's rights

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

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Why was the teenage girl crying? She wasn't, she was just experimenting with her emotions.

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How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

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A new restaurant KKKcake

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two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

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why did the frog cross the road it was stapled to a chicken

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops