What's worse than a tornado that kills your whole whole family? Nothing.

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

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Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Women's rights

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

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What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

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Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops