It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

Why didn't the boy go to school? He was sick.

Ms. Smoot's class

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Women's rights

A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

If you analyze this joke closely you' ll realize its not funny.

A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 'Cause 7 slept with 8 and punched 4 in the face.

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

Why did the kid kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Women.

What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

TJE ELIAS, LÄGET?

What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

My name is actually Nero by the way, or Neron, which means black, have you ever played Mortal Kombat? There is a character there Named Erron Black, which is a total pun on that, there is also a character named Boraicho which drinks constantly while Borracho means drunkard in Spanish so yeah, Erron Black is simply an anagram for Nero Black, or rather Neron Black... Anyway, now that we got your brain nice and confused, I can increase the effect with OVER NINE THOUSAND! So your pictures "remastered" on photoshop or something?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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