why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

ROSS G IS OBESE

Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

A man with a gun walks into a bar. The police are called and the man was killed quickly.

A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

( o Y o )

I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

Cold camel scrotum.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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