how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

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Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo Boo hoo? Boo hoo your parents are dead.

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What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

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What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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YOU

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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There was a car crash in Mexico, 78 people were announced dead.

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Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

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what's more funny then being raped? not being a minority!

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Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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