Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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What's black and white and red allover and can't fit through the door? A nun with a spear through her neck

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I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

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Their, they're, there You're, your

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how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

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democracy

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What is shaped like a duck without a beak? A duck that I punch the beak off of.

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A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

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What does A duck smoke? Quack

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How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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Cleveland winning something

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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Do you want to hear a joke? To bad! :)

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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What's the difference between Google Chrome and Bing? Not much. They are both very reliable and informative internet browsers.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops