What do you call a penguin in the desert? A penguin.

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What time is it? Refrigerator

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What did the pedophile say to the little girl? "I have a condition and I think it would be healthy for both of us if you stayed within the supervision of your parents"

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What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

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What is 2+2? 4!

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.....Carrot Top....

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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Why does dan leave Amy? Because dan is in another relationship and did not want to be unlawful to Amy.

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What did the skateboarder do when he was trying to do an ollie kickflip 360 and tailslide on a rail and dismount heelflip to manual? He fell

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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Q:How many Jews can you fit in a car? A:Two in the front, two in the back, and however many will fit in the ashtray.

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Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

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Why did spongebob eat Patrick Because he was hungry

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What's Tammie short for? Diabetes claimed both her legs.

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What rhymes with 'stick' and is brown? A stick

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what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

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What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were all of equal intelligence.

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Come on Red, I am linked with the fucking global bank, that does not mean I go there and get the money! The FBI keeps tabs on absolutely everything, everybody knows that, if Mike Tyson has a cup of tea there, they file him down. Its legal, its secure and incredibly expensive, but the FBI stands for the security of the US alone, that does not mean that they do not work with every other corporation, organization, affiliation,syndicate, and pff, anything. If you suspect that I somehow went from being one of the key members of the underground, to a fucking FBI agent, you can believe that, but then dont ask me for help, nor be my friend, without trust there is no friendship.

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I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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A man walks into a bar, and has to go to the hospital because he broke his nose.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops