GEORGE LOPEZ SUCKS

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The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because you didn't fuking cook to -.-

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Ebola

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What is black, white, and red all over? A person who has black, white, and red paint on his or her body.

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A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? An Xbox 360.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Knock Knock! The man inside chooses not to answer the door and the caller walks away.

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The Pope

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The weels on the bus go...flat

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2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

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What was everyone doing in the library? Reading

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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Women's rights

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What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

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how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

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porn-hub

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123 Main street

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Why did the airplane crash? It was hit by a flying refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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