Why did Hitler commit suicide? He looked at his gas bill.

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What's gay and ugly? An ugly gay.

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? bullshit!!

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

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A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

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Four Iraqis played hide and seek 17 years ago, one of them missing, why? he's still hiding.

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You

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That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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yo mama is so dumb she went to dr. dre for a pepsmear

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How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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