Why did the chicken cross the road... He wanted to get away from all those jerks who kept asking him why he made the decisions that he did. he later committed suicide...

Yo momma's so fat, that she was put in this joke

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

A Mexican and a Black man are in a car. Who's driving? The police officer.

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

What do you get if you take the head off a Koala and a Wombat and swap them around? A bloody mess and about 4 years in jail.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H2O." The second one then says "I'll have some H2O too." Both chemists live as no bartender is irresponsible enough to serve liquid hydrogen peroxide in a public bar.

What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

Two cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?!" ...Two days later, both of the cannibals became very ill with food poisoning. Always ensure meat is cooked thoroughly before eating.

Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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