Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

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why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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knock knock who's there police

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There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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Where is Madeline McCann? 6 Feet under....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Weiner

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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