what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

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Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Juan

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

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nba live 13

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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An Asian walks out of the library.

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Your Mom.

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"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's.

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

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240

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

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two biscuits rolling down a hill one says, " where you from" the other replied "im not telling you, youl steal my washing"

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

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Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

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Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

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Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

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What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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