What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

A black guy with his family.

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

how come so many people die every year due to starvation? They don't have enough food and there aren't nearly enough spider monkeys in North America.

What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

women's rights.

Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

When crossing the river, why the old lady die? She was hit by a falling brick that fell from an airplane.

What happened to the short kid on april 30th: His girlfriend broke up with him

I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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