Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

Why did the white man cry? Because his mistress, Shanghai, was threatening to tell his wife that they were in a relationship and, out of anger, he bashed Shanghai's head in and she is dead,

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

What do Japan and Haiti have in common? They are both islands.

When crossing the river, why the old lady die? She was hit by a falling brick that fell from an airplane.

why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

What did the German say the the Jewish man? "Hello, nice to meet you."

Joseph had been temporarily blinded for over a year. While blind, he saw the doctor who told him he would regain sight the next morning when he woke up. For this special moment, Joseph decided that the first thing he wanted to see was his wife. So, his wife decided to stay up all night so she was in the right position for when Joseph woke up. However, when Joseph woke up and opened his eyes his wife wasn't there so he was a little bit annoyed.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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