My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

What sauce do chicken's hate? Bone suckin' sauce

- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

what do u call a black person by his name

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

the comment about daniel was fron brock

a black man a chinese man and a mexican man are all on a plane. they land safely and continue with their lives.

There is a bird and a squirrel in a tree. Later, as a farmer walked past, the squirrel ate the bird.

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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