1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

Oh no! My life is ruined!

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

People Order Our Patties

Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

since when?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being shipped to KFC.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob Who? Bob the human.........

How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

what did one picture frame say to the other? Well you could answer with hows it hanging but thats not logical because they are inanimate

Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

a

69

pretend its saturday.... what is the square root of 9? who cares? everyone knows that you don't do math on saturday.

A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? D-12.

What do you get when you cross North Korea and the boston marathon? BOMBS! :(

What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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