A giant watermelon falls on a man He's dead

I have a crush on my dad.

Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

Why did the girl die? No one knows.

I have two hands. Some people dont.

Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get away from KFC, which was directly behind him.

...NO.

Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

69

There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

what is pink and fishy? pink fish.

What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

Two cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?!" ...Two days later, both of the cannibals became very ill with food poisoning. Always ensure meat is cooked thoroughly before eating.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

What do you call a black priest? Father

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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