What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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Why did the girl die? No one knows.

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A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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What do you call a group of black people? You don't You call the cops first.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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Shut the cork up!

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

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69

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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what is pink and fishy? pink fish.

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What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

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Two cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?!" ...Two days later, both of the cannibals became very ill with food poisoning. Always ensure meat is cooked thoroughly before eating.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops