A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

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guess what chicken butt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

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What happen to the guy who didn't breathe A. He died

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why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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we sat at the table and began to say graceme my sister, me and my mom we bowed our heads and closed our eyes and said grace we lifted our heads and opend our eyes and the food was gone my mom was gone and the chocolate in my pocket was gone (i wonder who did it lol)

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Women's rights...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Knoc nock whos dere ronnie turiaf...... Ronnie turiaf who Dennis rodman

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What do you call a black priest? Father

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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