Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

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Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? A:Pull the pin and throw it back

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A girl is on the phone with her boyfriend the boy friend has a rash the girl said put ointment on it ointment cures everything the boyfriend responded not cancer.

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What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

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why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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Why did the man fall down? He got shot

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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I have a crush on my dad.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

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Q: What do you get when you cross a rare breed of penguin with a horse. A: Well to be fair, turtles have shells

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HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

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a man walks into a prostitute.

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Does this napkin smell like chlorofoam?

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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I saw a poor man named rich

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Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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