What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

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Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

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Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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What do you call a Nazi in an airplane? Above sea level

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Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

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Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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twilight

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Q:Whats the difference between a black man and a park bench? A: A park bench can support a family.

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Q: What did the chinese man say to the other Chinese man? A: I don't know, I don't sneak Chinese

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

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What do you call a black man that robs a bank? A bank robber

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A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No soap, radio!

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Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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