What did the blonde say to the brunette? I'm sorry your brother died

Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shot in the face by a shotgun that shoots fireworks that explodes into chainsaw bullets.

How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

This is my first attempt at making an anti-joke: That's was it.

What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

what is the entire jewish population minus about 13 million? The Holocaust.

What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

Sorry boss

How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

Hey youknow what's funny???? Jokes

What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

Womens Rights.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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