Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Q: how do you make a baby blow bubbles? A: hold it under water, or as an alternative you could hold it under its twin sisters blood.

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What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Thats impossible because he cannot walk.

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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SCHNARRRRRR!!!!!

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Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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Did you hear about the cannibal who had a wife and ate kids?

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? KFC was on the other side

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What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

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What did the devil say to the baby with four arms? I am evil.

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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