A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

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How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

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i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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A muslim walks into a gay bar.

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What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

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Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

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Women

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

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"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

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A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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