There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What did Pikachu tell Ash? "Pikachu."

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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What do you call the black president? Mr.President

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

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Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

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Question: What did one lesbian say to the other lesbian at the grocery store? Answer: Will that be paper or plastic?

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Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

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whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 1027

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

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Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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