A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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what did the pregnant black woman say to the white man I'm pregnant

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What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

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Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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Q: What cracks while having sex? A: The pelvis of a four year old...

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What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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A white man and woman are married and the wife becomes pregnant. However, the wife has been having an affair with an African American man. The baby turns out to be white and so the woman was very fortunate or else the husband would have figured it out for sure.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

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How high is a Chinaman

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Did you hear the one about the kid that farted in class? Cool.

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Joey mayer's face

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How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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