It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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PISS OUT MY ASS!!!!!

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A Muslim walks out of a bar... Because he doesn't drink alcohol

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A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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Q:What's worse then Finding A Worm in Your apple? A: Realizing how empty your life is.

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What do you call a fat guy falling down stairs Japan suffering.

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Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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Have you seen Elton johns pet dog? Neither he's he.

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What do you call a deaf black man? Well, if you did not already know his name, you would first have to contact a member of his family, or a friend, and ask them, as even if you were able to communicate the question of 'what is your name?' to the man, it is well known that the speech of deaf people is nowhere near as clear as that of people who are able to hear.

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Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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Q: Why are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? One is alive meanwhile the other is an object full of solid waste.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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