A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

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who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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What did the pedophile say to the little girl? "I have a condition and I think it would be healthy for both of us if you stayed within the supervision of your parents"

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

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SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKY’S. PRETTY MUCH USELESS BUT MAKE YOU SMILE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS. Source: http://www.pingzic.com/funny-whatsapp-status-to-make-others-laugh/

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Black People.

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What do you call a man that goes to work every day to provide for his family? A spoon

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What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

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A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar. Or maybe a hospital... or possibly a church.

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Have you heard that Hitler and Osama Bin Laden share a room with saton in hell

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why don't you ask him, o wait he's a chicken, you cant ask him. he is incapeable of speaking.

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Q: What has four legs and an arm. A: A pitbull on a playground

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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Roses r red violets r blu I hav5 fingers the middle ones for u

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your friend Jim Oh hello Jim, please come in it is very nice to see you this fine evening.

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Why was the boy crying last night? - a clown raped him

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dick can talk And it says it wants you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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