Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

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Whats very large and produces alot of seamen. The US navy

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#scabbers

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

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THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

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-Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? -No -Niether have they

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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what did the pregnant black woman say to the white man I'm pregnant

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Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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How come Emmet Till never attended college? Because he was brutally murdered.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and stink.

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Why doesn't business go well for pizzeria Vesuvio? Their chef has been dead since many years.

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If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

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SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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