Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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