A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

thumb_up thumb_down -3

connor sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do get when you blend zebra, a cow and a walrus? A not very good smoothie

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many fools does it take to change a light bulb? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the newlywed couple who couldn't tell the difference between KY jelly and window putty? All their windows fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

vbh

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why is santa so jolly? hes not hes a fictional character made up by our parents imagination

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops