I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

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What did the blind man look at when the girl showed him her cleavage ? ... Nothing... He's blind... >_>

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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