a

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If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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What is the difference between a duck?

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

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A guy walks into a bar. He was an alcoholic and it was destroying his family.

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Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

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A girl is on the phone with her boyfriend the boy friend has a rash the girl said put ointment on it ointment cures everything the boyfriend responded not cancer.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

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What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow you just don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement."

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Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

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Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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Knock knock Who's there? Yo mamma Nobody's home, go away mom

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops