why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

Snausages.

If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

What's red and hurts you? A brick.

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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