What is the difference between a duck?

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If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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69

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1+1 =? Too

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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who smells? •Liam

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Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

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PENIS

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

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roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

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What happen to the guy who didn't breathe A. He died

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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There were three people on a plane, the plane crashed and they all died.

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How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Why wasn't the woman cooking in the kitchen? Both her hands had been cut off in a severe conveyor belt accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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