How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

So a black man hails a taxi...

What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

vagina, hehehehehehehe

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

what's more funny then being raped? not being a minority!

there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

Knock knock *runs away laughing*

Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

why are black people good at jumping and white people aren't? That's stereotyping people .... anyone can be good jumping as long as the practice.

Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

What is worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your worm!!!

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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