Q. How do Italian girls shave their legs? A. They lie down outside and have someone mow them.

Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

What does a rock become when it falls into the red sea? Wet.

A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

Whats yellow pink and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? Oh were you expecting an answer here, if i knew the answer i wouldn't have asked a question.

What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

What happened to the short kid on april 30th: His girlfriend broke up with him

Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

Two rabbis standing at the buffet cart. The first exclaims "Oy vey, those pork chops look good!". The second shrugs, turns to his friend and remarks, "So do your wife's norks".

Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

A blonde woman walked into a bar. She ordered a scotch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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