Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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Roses are red, That much is true, but Violet are purple, not ****ing blue

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What is 2+2? 4!

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get hit by a car

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

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You know what they say about people with big feet.......... They wear big shoes.

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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she wasn't 18

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

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Your so stupid, that your stupid.

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what's the fastest way to have someone murder you tell your wife you are cheating on her

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A son went to ask his father about his thoughts on abortion. "Dad, what do you think about abortion?" "Ask your sister." "I don't have a.."

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Q: What's better than ice cream? A: Two ice creams! Q: What's better than 2 ice creams? A: Still two ice creams!

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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What did Obama get at the bar? A shot... In the head.

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A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar. Or maybe a hospital... or possibly a church.

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Knock knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Bob Matthews.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops