P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

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How do you stop someone from simply copying an already posted anti-joke? No, seriously, how do you?

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A man walked into a bar There were some other people there too

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What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

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A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

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What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

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What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

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Justin Bieber's Never Say Never 3D came out the other day. I went to see it, and it was a pretty good movie.

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I like to eat people

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What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

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Yo mama's so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever it's very inspirational, good for her.

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Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

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weiner? balls

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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What do a black person and a monkey have in common? A. They both are organism that need food and water to survive.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a horrible pedophile and has deeply seeded emotional problems

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? A:Pull the pin and throw it back

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When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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