Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

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What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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Q: What's big, brown, and smell like crap? A: Turd.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What'sucks and white Jackson

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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my friend is gay hes gay

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

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How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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Roses are red, That much is true, but Violet are purple, not ****ing blue

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Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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What is 2+2? 4!

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get hit by a car

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what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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You know what they say about people with big feet.......... They wear big shoes.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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she wasn't 18

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops