My bologna has a first name It's O-S-C-A-R... My bologna has a second name It's M-A-Y-E-R... Oscar and Mayer were the names of the pig and the cow that were slaughtered and subsequently processed into the bologna I am eating.

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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How many cows say moo? All of them

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

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Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

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a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

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roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

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What's worse than losing the remote Finding it in your ass hole

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What's the square root of 6739472? Who gives a f***?

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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What do Jews, Muslims and Blacks have in common? They are all valuable members of the community and should be treated no differently from anyone else

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What's Mexico's favorite sport? Cross Country

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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What is the difference between a firework and a dog? One is funny to blow up and the other one is pretty lights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops