A white man wakes up in the middle of the night and sees a black burglar trying to steal his hard earned possessions that he slaved many hours for, being a man who enjoyed living a man of luxury and hates people of foreign nature who steal his things said to him. " get out"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

daniel thinks 30 rock is funny

thumb_up thumb_down +23

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +23

an englishman an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar there was no welshman. they didn't phone him due to his uncontrollable thirst for violence

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A black man walks up to a bank teller and pulls out a gun, he proceeds to tell the bank teller he saw a white man drop it outside the bank.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A; On the other side was another beautiful looking chicken who he plans to marry and raise a family with.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it because it isn't coming.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do the holocaust and 9/11 have in common? They were both terrible tragedies that people will look back upon in sadness for years.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was Catholic, and it couldn't cross itself.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the homeless man get for his birthday. Nothing. Get it: He lived a life along with a giant family and on christmas eve 2012 he broke his kneecap and was in the E.R. He got out of the hospital on christmas only to come home to find a burning house; his house. Every member in his family died except for him as they were all in the house when it caught on fire. The house completely burnt and crumbled, and that is why he is homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

69. Yeah- that's my street address.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

White people talk like this 'HEY' Black people talk like this 'YO' Hundreds of thousands died in the civil war.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops