A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

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How do you blindfold and Asian? By using a sturdy bandanna, cloth, any other object to avert ones view.

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Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

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What do you call the black president? Mr.President

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HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

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Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

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Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

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What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

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WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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