if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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Hope you all drop the soap in prison

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

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anne hatthaway

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My name is actually Nero by the way, or Neron, which means black, have you ever played Mortal Kombat? There is a character there Named Erron Black, which is a total pun on that, there is also a character named Boraicho which drinks constantly while Borracho means drunkard in Spanish so yeah, Erron Black is simply an anagram for Nero Black, or rather Neron Black... Anyway, now that we got your brain nice and confused, I can increase the effect with OVER NINE THOUSAND! So your pictures "remastered" on photoshop or something?

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Susie has Autism

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An Asian gets into her car to drive to her grandmother's house. She arrives at 6:30 and has a wonderful dinner.

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why couldn't the boy eat his oreo's? His sister ate it.

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it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

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What does shit and fire have in common? Hitler gave both to jews.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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The 19th Amendment

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What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

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The BCS

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Male penises.

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A disabled man walks into a bar.

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911 joke ? now thats just plane rude.

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What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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