One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

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How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

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brian mcgee is gay!

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This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

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What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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Why did the monkey fall of the tree? Because Newtons law states that we are all under the influence of gravity and hence an object, in this case the monkey, will fall down if it failed to stay on the tree.

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What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

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what do you call a somone who murders someone else? black.

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

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How do you make a ninja fly a plane? You put a gun to his head and say fly this plane.

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

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Women's rights

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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what is big and white? the moon

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What do you call two black guys having sex with Paris Hilton? N*ggas in Paris

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Minecraft.

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What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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